If you think about how you want this year to be different, your initial answers might read like a version of the American dream: get a better job, make more money, travel, get serious about exercise…
But is that what you really want — or what you’ve been conditioned to say? Chances are, those are standard answers given without much thought.
But if you're highly sensitive introvert, you’re not a standard person, and you don't thrive on standard anything.
You tend to be think deeply, analyze more, and (if given the time) will dig to discover your own unique answer.
One way to discover a truer answer is by checking in with your body. Your mind can fool you at times, but your body rarely lies.
Allow yourself to get quiet, relax, and close your eyes. Then pose the question, How do I want this year to be different?
Let yourself be more in your body than in your head. Tune into how it feels, just observe without thinking too much.
Gently notice what’s going on in your body: sensations, light, sound, color, words, images — anything. How does your body answer that question?
If you don’t get any information, that’s okay. This may be an unfamiliar way to communicate with yourself and will take some practice. I promise you, it’s well worth the time and effort to become attuned and to listen more carefully to your intuition.
How might your life be different if you stepped more fully into your authentic self? What does your wise self — that quiet voice within — have to say?
Jenn Granneman tells a story in The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World about when she was in eighth grade and found a T-shirt that said “Be as you are.”
Even though it was a size too small and her middle school friends couldn’t understand why she wore it, her intuition told her there was something about that message that held the secret to life.
Be as you are. Not who others want you to be. Not who you think you should be. Not who you’ll be when you finish your novel, receive that certificate, lose 10 pounds, move to a better part of the country, or find your true love.
Be as you are. Here and now. In this moment. In this lifetime.
How might your life be different if this was the year that you dug deep and found your truest self?
This week in the LOVE NOTE I sent out to my clients I shared a quote which resonated deeply with me, and I want to share it with you, too.
For some of us, it's hard to "be as we are" because we're out of practice being our authentic selves. If this is you, read on. This quote is from Emily McDowell, founder of the Emily McDowell Studio.
"Finding yourself" is not really how it works. You aren't a ten-dollar bill in last winter's coat pocket. You are also not lost.
I love this because it's a reminder that the new house, job, exercise routine, college degree — anything external — is not going to help you find happiness or be your best self.
Happiness comes from inside; it comes from “returning to yourself… and remembering who you were before the world got its hands on you.”
What if you hold the key to what you want — and you just need some help with the lock?
What if accepting your deepest and truest sense of self and appreciating all that you are was the important work of this year?
If you allowed yourself to believe that you can uncover your true self under all the cultural conditioning and false messages you've received, and accept that what you find is already good enough, what would that look like?
What would it feel like to give your authentic self unconditional love?
Are you ready to step into your best self?
If you're ready to let go of fear, worry, and limiting beliefs, and clarify your passions and dreams, I encourage you to join me and a small group of highly sensitive women for my individualized coaching program, REDISCOVER YOUR BEST SELF.
This can be your year to:
+ Get rid of anxiety, fear, & worry
+ Release limiting beliefs and unlock your true potential
+ Access a deep sense of self-worth
+ End the feeling of being 'different' with women who totally get you
+ Begin to use your inner wisdom
+ Treat your High Sensitivity as a strength
Curious how this could work for you? Schedule a free consult with me. We'll hop on the phone to see where you're at and where you want to be at the end the year. I'll offer you a personal plan for moving forward, and we'll see if REDISCOVER YOUR BEST SELF is a match — or not. Either way you'll have a plan to keep you going in the right direction.
There are spaces for just 10 women for this program and it will go out to a much wider audience on Monday, so I encourage you to take action now and find out if this is a fit for you.
With warmth and love,
P.S. Ready to say goodbye to fear and worry in 2019? Click below to schedule a time to talk. We'll see what's true for you, where you want to be, get you a plan for moving forward, and see if REDISCOVER YOUR BEST SELF is the right next step.
Overthinking. That's one of the things I want to tell you about today. Nearly all the Sensitive Introverts that I’ve talked to mentioned this as a major challenge. One of them put it this way: “If I could just not overthink, analyze, process, and agonize over every single detail, I might be able to find the gold within myself.”
This is so well-stated. While studies document how introverts take more care in thinking through possibilities and make choices with care, Sensitive Introverts appear to take it a few steps further. We can get overwhelmed by all the possible options and spend a huge amount of energy trying to eliminate uncertainty and mistakes. Often this leads to procrastination, not to mention worry and even anxiety. It takes work of a very different nature to allow ourselves to see the “gold” within.
We also worry and fret over what others will think of our choices or if we’ll offend someone, or even if something we choose might drive someone away who is important to us. It can feel pretty intense. Sensitive Introverts employ a lot of safety strategies to ensure that everything goes right but the strategies don’t really serve us very well. Even when it seems like they’d help us to keep things smooth and harmonious they can make us more anxious.
Our fear of making mistakes can cause us to feel uncomfortable conveying our thoughts, though in our heads we talk a mile a minute about everything we're pondering. And introverts are notoriously averse to small talk, making mundane conversation not only a challenge but a chore. This discomfort often carries over into being observed. Sensitive Introverts can get very nervous—whether it’s a public-speaking gig or merely someone watching over our shoulder while we type.
Intuition. The other focus of today's post. Sadly, most of us have a hard time listening to our intuition. It’s so easily drowned out by what others say and by what society tells us is the right thing. Since introverts number fewer than extroverts, and Sensitive Introverts are even a smaller group, the mainstream voice is rarely in sync with our inner wisdom. Consequently, the small, clear voice within gets ignored because the other voices are a lot louder and more demanding.
Being aware of the things we get hooked by is key. When we know our triggers we can breathe into the anxiety and get ourselves out of our reptile brains (think fight, flight, or freeze) and back into our thinking brains.
But slowing down enough to hear our inner wisdom is more than just learning a tool, it’s a practice. Like strengthening our muscles we need to take time to build our skills to listen to our wise selves. Often we’re not sure if the whispers we hear are our own intuition or something we picked up somewhere. It’s only with consistent attention to tuning in that we start to hear what our hearts are telling us.
When Sensitive Introverts begin to feel their innate worth, they raise their comfort level with spontaneity, expressing their thoughts, and being present. That's when life takes on an enjoyable feeling of ease and serenity that grows SI's confidence!
This fall I will be leading a group of 12 women on a nine-month journey to let go of what is no longer serving them and to embrace a new way of being that resonates with their Sensitive Introvert temperament, mind, and inner wisdom. If what you’ve been reading speaks to you and you’re curious about joining us, I invite you put your name on the Interest List. That way you will receive registration information, as well as access to the Early Bird pricing. You can get on the no-obligation Interest List HERE.
Thank you for reading, sharing, and supporting from afar!
P.S. Get on the Interest List for the Welcome Home to Your Self program HERE.